Stale

Nothing tastes as much of regret as yesterday's coffee.
Unless it's that weird, woolly taste of your tongue...
Too many puffs, too little water, and a little too much anger.

The best way to express these days...
Is those last moments of quiet when you beat the alarm and grumble awake too early,
Only to take sips of coffee that's been chilling since you ran out the door last morning,
Stretching your toes because they're cramped,
Wondering what important things you missed yesterday;
And ignoring work texts because it's not 9.30 yet, fuck you.

Actually, a good caption for these days is coffee and ignorance.

Fun working-person tip: shutting the world out doesn't keep it out,
It gives everyone the liberty to waltz in to your personal space,
And remind you that you're not making your presence felt in their lives,
And make you feel like a piece of shit.
So you run out for a solitary beer after a hard day,
Coz you can't afford to make a friend to take along.

Coz you don't want one more unread notification.
Coz you only have some time before the alarm rings.
And coz that coffee will still lie in the fridge
Getting more frozen,
If you try to reply to your life every morning.

Another good caption:
Life as a Monorail.
Monotonous one way railroad track
From A to B
Flying through people and pollution
Picking up only grime
And letting the people off at their stops.
While you never stop.

Doing what you're supposed to, right?
But you never seem to be right on time
Or fast enough
Or the AC isn't cold enough
Or you're just too crowded.

But that's your job.
And you get no praise nor pity
For doing your job.
Only complaints on unnecessarily numerous social media channels and personal email stinkers.

So a few more puffs
A sip of water
A resolution to drink more water
A vague inkling to make plans for later
And that coffee.

Probably today
I'll manage to drink more.
Water.

#AboutLastNight

Liquid courage, they call it;
A swig is all you need
To take life by the balls
And to chase your dreams.

One swig
And you'll stop being scared
Stop wishing you'd dared
That one time
When you ran away.

It's fight distilled from adrenaline

It's the balls to say what you mean.

Liquid courage
One swig and you're super human;

You're doing stuff they said you can't
You're breaking rules
You never believed in
You're saying words
You rehearsed
A hundred times in front of a mirror.

A sip to remember
That you're the boss
That it's your job
To take charge
Send that mail
And goddammit, ask for that raise!

Your best friend
Leading you to the dance floor
That lying bastard
Who says you're a bomb
When you're probably more a nunchuk
And that REALLY shouldn't be
Your song.

Your wingman
Who hates to see you crash and burn
But knows she's so damn far
Out of your league
That you probably shouldn't even dream of her.
A swig is all it takes

For "Hi, what're you drinking?"

That idiot
Who told you "You have a dream""
"You have a gift
Damn, you should perform your poetry
It really speaks to me"
Except they've been swigging
Pretty damn hard themselves.

Aged for years
With wisdom imbibed from
Oak casks, and brewing tanks
Microscopic bubbles of yeast-fuelled logic
Pushing their way into your mind
Telling you what you already know
Just don't have the impetus to go for.

Liquid fucking courage.
Because for some reason
Without one swig
You have a duty to suppress it
You know what you want
But you're denied it
Flight fights back
Flight comes in first place
While you cower in the back
"Bhai daaru lao..."

I'm Okay

The shower beats down steam & heat
Blessed relief from the deep freeze
And that’s good for now.

You’re okay
You’re alright
Close your eyes
And let the beat
Of the water repeat
The words so you believe

You’re okay
You’re alright

Repeat anything enough
And it comes true
Bullshit with a straight face
And anyone will believe you
You just need to commit

To memory like back in school
Where you had to remember, not Google
Commit
To the back of your mind
Like the tables we memorized
And then left far behind

Commit
To forgetting
To ignoring
To leaving it all behind
To getting better
And better
And better
Till nobody says
Are you okay?
Should you get help?
You’ve been really down
Get out of the funk now!

Commit
To hiding the existence
To avoiding the reactions
To dedication
Perseverance
And sheer
Fucking
Willpower!

I'm fine! 
I'm alright! 
I'm only washing my hair
That's why it took so long in there
Some extra grooming
Something unwanted needed removing 

You’ll believe it
If you repeat it enough
And you must
You must learn

To forget
Forget about the dark; forget it exists
Forget the endless nights fearing dawn
Looking for a way out of it all
Forget the feeling of being at the top of a fall you can predict
That hermetically sealed bubble slowly closing in
Forget the insecurities
The painful memories
Forget how it feels
In fact, douse the heat
Of how you feel
And push everything back into deep-freeze

The water is ice cold now
The geyser ran out of warmth
Trying to drum some into the arctic cold
That just refuses to leave
So I give up & let the icicles in
Beating down till I’m tingling
And I don’t know if I’m in pain
Or just numb now

You’re okay
You’re alright
My teeth chatter in time to the beat
As the water repeats
The mantra back to me

You’re okay.
You’re alright.

Repeat anything enough and you believe it
Bullshit with a straight face & you're sure to win
Going through the motions
Ignoring the emotions
I don't know when the argument
Ends
And reality begins

You're okay.
You're alright.

Long Distance

Have you met love?
Love is mankind’s hero
It defeats all evil
Transcends all barriers
Brings people closer
And charts the quickest paths from A to B

Love takes two buses
Dives into rush hour traffic
Then hides until the coast is clear
 
Love travels to wintry, rainy, cold, uncomfortable places
But love… Poor thing
Is no match for distance

Nobody likes distance
Distance is love’s worst nightmare
Only pretends to make the heart grow fonder
And all the while making love’s job harder
With every trip
With every mode of transport
Love never gets closer, only further away
Because distance is winning today

Love isn’t about togetherness
Not anymore
Love is stuck with a phone call
Or a text message
Today, a voice note
Or a wall post
Love is a bunch of words on virtual paper
And a very, very long distance

Love fights a constant battle
A cartographer’s worst nightmare
Charting maps on demand
Building bridge after bridge
Spanning countries and cities and area codes
And career choices and homes and walls

And continuous business
To internet service providers
Because love is shared sunsets
Over skype calls
And a rousing discussion about movies
Watched separately

How can love catch up with us?
We’re not making things easy
Because we won’t stand still
We move on and on and on…
Your life, my life, different lives
You wouldn’t understand
You don’t get it
You had the be there…

But here’s the thing.
Sure there’s a story you’re not watching live
But every voice note lets you in on someone’s life
That wall post, the social media updates
That’s not compensation, that’s information

Your auto ride & OLA cab bills
Aren’t money, they’re investments

Love is standing on this stage
Walking into a room
Smiling like your jaw will split
Love is the hug and the dimly lit nights
Love is savoring every moment before the next goodbye
Heightening the feeling of each other’s arms
Love is laughing about sharing a beer in person
And forgetting the pain of drinking it alone
Love is the bus-ticket, train ticket, empty bank account
Love is a paper napkin in the back of your book
A memory card full of photos you had to laugh about together
A joke you had to be there to understand
But you get it anyway
Because you can see it happen in your head

Love is a vague notion
Every time something goes wrong
That you know who can make it right
It’s not having to be there to make you smile
It’s a cat video shared on your wall
A text wishing you happy birthday
Love is the last dance…
Late night conversations under streetlamps
Because who knows when you’ll talk like this again?
It’s talking like that again
And again
And again…

The empty space next to you isn’t taunting you
It’s giving you strength
Because there are people out there filling it
Right now
With their presence
You just can’t see them

The space doesn’t defeat love
The space reinforces love
Reminds you every day
That there’s love out there
That empty space is your catalyst
Pushing you for that weekend trip away,
Every new map of A to B
That’s love.

Love trumps distance
Because Love is not just the goodbye
Love is the welcome back.

Aashna Iyer Performs - "Pulse"

Still not great, but it's about time that my homage to my city find its place here.

Because the thump-thump-thump in my veins is the pulse that runs in the veins of the city.

Aashna Iyer - The Last Supper - Airplane Poetry Movement

Aashna Iyer Performs - "Inheritance"

I can't believe it took me this long to put this up!

Really makes me question my existence, this lapse... Anyway...

Menstruation isn't too much fun, guys, I mean, let's face it, we hate 'that time of month'. And you know what society does to make it better for us?

They treat us like we're dirty.

We're not allowed into temples, not allowed to touch our own stuff, not allowed to eat what we want, wear what we want, not allowed to play with who we want... Life after puberty is shitty, if you're a woman, and there's no reason why it should be!

It's so silly that we're a country of people for whom sacred equals 'motherland', 'gai-mata', 'Durga-ma' and what not... You know what ALL MOTHERS have to go through? Menstruation!

What is the logic here? NONE!

This is my attempt to get you to think a little, question a little, and maybe stop inheriting those ridiculous bits and pieces of knowledge that have been passed down to you by generations of ignorance...

Shadow

Ever tried and failed to forget someone? Here's what that's like...

APM Basement - My Life is a Box

Storms

You never stand under a tree when there’s a storm coming

You run for cover, run home to a warm cup of coffee

You don’t stand around, waiting for the storm to hit, enthralled by it’s whirling, swirling gusts of wind

Pushing you around, the rain and thunder engulfing you till you’re the only one you know exists because the rain is hiding you from view

It’s only when the storm passes and you walk home, sodden, squelching water at every step, ears still echoing from the wind and thunder that you look back and realise that you’re storm-washed and storm-drenched and you’ll never be that person again

You marvel at other people standing around marvelling at your ridiculous choice or bad luck to be caught in a massive thunder-lightning-pouring-rain-storm

Because they, who ran away, safe at home, doing the right thing would never know the delight of being alone out there and feeling all the dirt and grime be replaced by a light-headed, freshly-washed fuzzy warmth that no amount of coffee can replicate

That’s what I was thinking once, as I walked up to perform

This… This is like standing outdoors in that storm.

You’re alone up here, with everyone watching you take on the forces of the stage.

It’s lights, sound, action as you breathe in deep, it’s just you and your words and your thoughts as you keep time

As you keep count

As you keep pace

As you keep track of the words and the thoughts…

As you perform

It’s a temporal, beautiful, nerve-wracking ordeal

It’s stress like no other, it’s love like no other, it’s a high like no other

And it’s something people might scoff at you for, they’ll tell you that you’re wasting time;

That you’re betting on a losing horse

That you’re heading for a fall.

They’ll tell you that you have priorities,

You have responsibilities,

You have duties,

You have families… But you run out into the storm anyway

Because when you step off that stage, aware of every squelching step away from the spotlight,

You know that the person who stepped up to take on the stage is not the same as the person who walks away.

You feel that light-headed, freshly-washed fuzzy warmth that only comes when you’ve faced up to a storm.

Cat Addict - Poetry Slam, Mumbai

Because they're felines and you have no choice. They took over the internet, and will slowly take over the world!

Kahaani Kuch Jyaada Hi TV Ki

The midget is your usual TV-enthusiast child-of-the-90s.
I love my cartoons, and my RomComs and SitComs and have a particular soft corner good-looking men with sexy accents.
I don't usually rant about the media, because, let's face it, my bread-sans-butter comes from all kinds of media thingamies. But there's one thing I cannot suffer silently, and that's the soap-opera. More specifically, the Indian TVC's contribution to soap-operas has me fuming.
Because in a country where they only need the dream of the hint of smoke before they call the fire-brigade, the blatant kitchen-sink politics they showcase, even glorify can contribute to some unpleasant domestic situations. Our TVCs show violence, greed, crime, adultery, emotional abuse all in the guise of 'entertainment'.

It frustrates me. So I did what I always do when frustrated. I wrote. And then performed it. Here it is... Kahaani Kuch Zyaada Hi TV Ki

Responses welcome.

Critique encouraged.

Please do fight with me on this one. I'd love to have a chance to rant impromptu!

Why, Laptop, Why? - Pune Poetry Slam

Because technology gets us hooked and then tests its power... Why, Laptop? Why did you have to do what you did to me?

My Life is a Box

My life is a life in a box

Everything I own fits in a box

Every family member has a box.

I live in a box, sometimes out of a box.

Everything can be folded, just so

So everything has a proper place to go

All my things fit neatly one by one

New things replace the old stuff with which you’re done

There’s a master-box called ‘Life’ with a shiny red button

It’s the trigger that’s activated all of a sudden

And wham! The world springs into motion

Moving from hill to plain or ocean to ocean

Everything wrapped up in paper or plastic

Fit in its box, defying all logic

Nothing of life as we knew it remains

The four walls, once a house, now nothing’s the same

My room, the bookcase, bar, cupboards along

We move on and on and on and on

When I was young, I thought this was it

This was what every family did

Come home one day, the boxes are out

It never ends, all the moving about.

Eventually I guessed that it’s not a norm

Not too many others move on and on

So many times from one place to the next

That houses are static, I’d never have guessed.

I’d taken a flight before my peers did

I’d seen more new schools than any other kid

Somewhere in each new school I found

A familiar face from my past around

Every old friend was still different to me

We all changed, place to place, do you see?

Every new school was a chance to start fresh

Who you were from class to class was anyone’s guess

The nerd from 4D was the jock of the year

In 7A that shy chick from 3C appeared

But holy crap, she’s popular now

And how can you like THAT 10B cow?

Oh everyone changes from class to class

Like scenes from a movie, nothing much lasts

Your best friend with whom you played in the dirt

Now is the player with the mini-skirt.

That guy you always thought was a geek

Is now the one all hot girls seek

And you, the observer, from next to the wall

Don’t assume you haven’t changed at all

You’ll eventually all meet up once more

In a world where Facebook can even the score

And “Oh my God, you’re so different!” is the standard hello

From people who once you claimed to know

The Pandora’s box of your life the opens up

And reminds you that you’re still stuck

Amidst boxes.

Boxes with neat school-based labels on

Boxes with multiple names scribbled on

And some with no name that you’re scared to touch

For fear they might reminds you of too much

Every box opens into a wonderful world

In the past when you were a littler girl

And the boxes weren’t quite so very many

Neither were they ever quite so heavy

As life begins to become more multi-hued

Your boxes increase in number too

And when people talk of some vague ‘baggage’

You actually have it, in physical luggage!

You’re capable of lording it over

Any rummaging, kleptomaniac hoarder

And eventually, in the chapter for the life you led

There’ll be a list of box-contents instead

Chai-Biskoot

Once upon a tea-time, there was a Parle-G

We know of it, this isn’t something alien to you and me

But in its little chai-time world, the little thing was upset

Because the one it loved most of all didn’t acknowledge it as yet

“All I want is some warmth in life” sighed little Parle-G

“There’s nothing worse than loneliness, if you care to ask me

And a love once warm, which has sat cooling for too long

Or a love that’s weak and pale and not passionate and strong”

The reason behind these laments made by little Parle-G

Was its undying everlasting love for adrak-wala-tea

It was a result of a fleeting glance across the kitchen shelf

That made the little biscuit forget absolutely all else.

“Someday, they’ll remember me and take me down as well

And that’s the day that chai will fall under my glucose-fuelled spell”

Thus Parle-G hatched carefully, a plan for that fateful day

And one day, lo and behold, a hand reached up its way.

And down came Parle-G in joy, heart singing a random tune

The scene with chai, till now a dream, to be realized real soon

Imagine the horror of the sound of an exclaimed realization

“This packet has expired! I’m throwing it, there’s no question”

And Parle-G cried out in dismay as the dream faded away

Eyes closed, hoped for a miracle, at least some time in the tray

But when Parle-G opened its eyes, it knew without a doubt

This was the dreaded dustbin which was eventually emptied out

Parle-G was heartbroken, and deprived of love for sure

It lay morose where it was tossed, incapable of moving anymore

A small voice came from nearby, almost inaudible at first

“I’m so glad I finally found you, I’m so happy, I could burst”

Parle-G, first terrified of a disembodied voice

Eventually calmed down enough to note in some surprise

That there was a lump of something very near where it lay

After gathering some energy “Who are you?” it managed to say

“I’m sorry, I’ve been rude,” came the reply, “I should have said before”

“My name is Chai, I’ve seen you on the shelf, you probably don’t remember me, though”

Imagine the joy in Parle-G’s heart when it realized it had met its love

After all the prayers sent fervently to the tea-party above

Together, in the dark, smelly bin, Chai and biscuit bonded

And as they spoke, magic took place much like what P-G wanted

“An undeniable bond they shared, one that would never break

And thus, with every cup of tea, a biscuit one will take”

Thus said the chai-time goddess, the queen of tapris, cafes and homes

After watching the love and camaraderie between the two unfold

And thus, today, no matter who you are, when having tea

You’ll always feel unsatisfied until you unite it with Parle-G

“You'll drown in my love, I must warn you, my sweet

There's disaster guaranteed when you and I meet

Your very self will crumble in the flood of my feelings

You must know beforehand with what you are dealing.”

Chai, thus, with a little tremble, warned Parle-G off

Afraid that it would cause the destruction of their love

And was beyond surprised when smitten P-G

Proceeded to crumble into the tea

And said with a smile that touched Chai's heart

"At least this way, we never will part

And you, too, are becoming a part of me

Forever we'll be Parle-G and tea"

This is a love for the ages, I personally feel

Something that we should learn from, a love so very real

No fancy games, no dates, no phones, no complications arise

All that this is, is togetherness, taught effectively by biscuit and chai.